Happy weekend people!
So this weekend’s non-beauty related post doesn’t, at the time of writing, have a title. That’s because for the first time ever I think, I’m sat here with a blank page and not entirely sure what’s going to come out of my mind.
I think maybe I’ll just tell you some of the stuff that’s been whizzing round my brain this week and some of the things I’ve been loving and doing.
Happy Weekend, what are you up to?
I don’t know if there’s anything in the world more painful than watching your child suffer… whether that be a physical suffering, or an emotional suffering. It’s fair to say that for a parent, this can translate to a physical nearly-pain like feeling. Very hard to describe.
I’ve talked before about the problems we have with Chloe and I don’t want to go into too much here really.
But she’s facing difficulties, socially (amongst other things), and at six years old she’s been having social difficulties for most of her little life.
So the school as a whole have been great at getting an Educational Psychologist referral and appointment but not all that great at any thing else, so today (Friday), I think I’ve finally made the decision to move her to another school. It’s not an easy decision and it’s not set in stone at this point but I owe it to my children to give them the best childhood I can, and the best education and the best school life I can. And having a school that actually seems to care would be a good start.
This crazy beauty deserves the best of everything and that means finding her a school where her teachers don’t find her annoying or irritating (and if they do, they are able to find a more diplomatic and sensitive way of saying so!).
If anyone has experience of moving a child to a new school at about this age (6), I’d love to hear how it went for you. Please share. Thank you.
In recent months I’ve become an angry person. In my life I’ve all kinds of emotions, but it’s rare for anger to be an emotion that sticks around. I’m not sure how long it’s been around, I think it may have crept up on me and so it is that I’m finding that I’m angry a lot of the time. And don’t get me wrong, it’s a good angry, it’s the kind of angry that gets messages out and things done, it’s anger that at long last I’m channeling in a good way.
I can sum up in one word what is making me angry and that word is fascism. I’m just going to bullet point a few of the issues that are bothering me.
So for that last seven years I’ve been a stay at home Mum and I’ve loved it. In fact I’d rather it didn’t ever come to an end. But life is such that all good things must come to an end and so it is that I’ve got to find work.
In a previous life I was a legal secretary and I don’t want to return to that. Then I trained to be a nail technician but that hasn’t really worked out as I had planned. And now, with my youngest starting school in September and our lack of funds, the time has come for me to seriously consider what I’m going to do with myself.
So I need work that is going to fit in around the children. I don’t mind bunging them in after school or breakfast club a few times a week but I don’t want both of those to be a daily feature for my children. So the way I see things, that leaves me with a few options:
PS: I think for now, I’m going to keep all non make up related posts to the weekends and see how that feels for a while xx
I just wanted to do a little post to let you all know that I’m going to change the blog a little bit. It’s still going to mostly be beauty because thats my passion but I’m going to start adding in other things which I hope you’ll either enjoy, or won’t mind skipping past if you don’t.
I’m talking about things like the odd book review, or stuff relating to my children, or even politics which is my overriding passion at the moment. As I say, I envisage Lady of the Lane will remain first and foremost a beauty reviews site, but with a few other posts here and there which will tell you a bit about more about me and my life and likes outside beauty!
I’m also reinstating Beauty Bloggers Best Things which was my really successful weekly slot where I asked other beauty bloggers what their favourite products are. It was always a great read and not only that but a great introduction to new blogs. So if you are a beauty blogger and you fancy taking part please do email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I’m still working on a new set of questions so give me a day or two to get back to you while I finalise the questionnaire!
Much love and thank you to all who read, new readers and those who’ve been with me since the beginning! It’s so appreciated!
Just a quick post to say that today I’m over at the Beauty Bay blog reviewing the Cover FX Creamy Concealer. I recommend you check it out as it’s been a godsend product for me in recent weeks!
And a reminder that I have a few things left in my blog sale so please do head over and take a look!
It’s no secret that I’m a big fan of Stranger London. Until now my purchases have been jewellery or nail related but as a secret fan of beautiful stationary I couldn’t resist the foldy case and notepad. Unfortunately for me, neither could anyone else and they kept selling out before I could get one! Eventually though I managed to get myself a Foldy Case and Notepad and I just want to share it with you.
That Peculiar One is not only a great talent with jewellery, but also with a needle and thread. You might be wondering what a Foldy Case is… hopefully this plethora of photographs should clear up any questions. It’s a thing of great beauty and whimsy.
Take a look.
And so you see, the Foldy Case is a thing. A thing for your lovely things to go in. And now I am compelled to buy a lovely pen to go in my Foldy Case thing.
Currently there are none of these on the website, and I don’t know if they’ll be back, they sure were a success, but please do take a look for other things of great great loveliness.
You must also check out Worship Blues Blog, written by the one and same Peculiar One. It’s not only my favourite blog, but there’s the cutest giveaway going on at the moment.
I recently had an experience which as a blogger wasn’t great and I wanted to share it with you so that other bloggers can try to avoid the same situation.
I was recently approached by a social media agency and asked if I’d like to try out a product. Now this happens to me all the time, most things I feature on this blog come to me as a press sample and I always feel really lucky. I am selective though and there are many things I turn down as they are unsuitable for my blog, or I don’t think I will like them, or for whatever reason. However on this occasion I really liked the sound of the product so I said yes please, I’d love to try this. This is standard stuff, I do this several times a week. Would you like to try our product? Yes Please or No Thanks. Product comes. I use it for a period of time, then I blog about it when I’m ready.
However. After I’d said yes please and provided my address, the following day I received an email from the social media agency saying that it had been posted out to me and they were looking forward to hearing my thoughts. Other bloggers should be nodding along at this point, it’s all standard stuff. Only thing is In this email sent confirming the dispatch, was a note giving me an extremely short deadline…at this point, a more experienced and knowledgeable blogger would have said…er no! But I didn’t, I replied saying it was very short notice but I’d do my best.
Lesson One: blogging should be on your terms, unless you are being paid.
They agreed it was short notice but hoped I’d be able to mange it anyway. Now see at this point they had me in their claws, because I like to think I’m an honourable blogger, once I’ve received a product, I feel I have to blog about it… after all, I’ve been sent something lovely for nothing, that’s how I feel. Very rarely I won’t blog about something, usually if I am completely indifferent to it, and I just can’t think of anything to say, but mostly, if I’m sent a product, I review it. I don’t feel happy taking something for nothing, so I view taking the product as a sort of payment. Which in all honesty is fine with your standard blog posts, but when people start giving you instructions then it becomes less about blogging about lovely stuff, and more like unpaid work….
And that’s when I was provided with the list of keywords I had to insert into my blog post. My blog post which I was given just a few days notice to write. Despite my backlog of things here to write about. Again, the more experienced and knowledgeable would have said, oh no, you can stuff it. In fact that is exactly what I was advised to do by more experienced blogger friends. But oh no, I had product on its way to me, which meant I personally felt honour bound to write the post.
Lesson Two: blogging should be on your terms, unless you are being paid.
And as it happened, the item turned up one day before the deadline. Hardly enough time to try out and review anything much if you want to maintain integrity. But again, stupidly, I felt honour bound to do as I was asked. What I should have said was, no, there’s no way I am doing this, the time scale is too short and I never agreed to use any key words.
But I didn’t because I’m clueless about this kind of thing. But perhaps my experiences might help someone else. The problem from my point of view was the agency didn’t disclose fully what they expected from me in the first instance. If they had have contacted me saying would you like to review xxx product, and could you include these key words, and also we have a very short deadline, do you think it would be possible? I would have probably declined. But I feel this was sneakily done. I accepted the product, it was dispatched and then the various terms were mentioned. And not in one go either.
So bloggers, don’t be a fool like me, if you don’t want to do something or if you feel something is unreasonable, say so, don’t do it, or ask what is in it for you? As a friend said to me recently on this subject…
“bottom line is that
you don’t jump through hoops – they want something from you, not the other way
round. Unless it is a million dollar ***, don’t bother.”
Stick up for yourself and don’t let yourself be taken advantage of and ask when approached by social media agencies in particular, if they have any terms you need to be aware of before accepting the item for review. I did review this product by the way, because I don’t think I’ll ever shake this thing of feeling I need to blog about something if I’ve been sent it, but I won’t be making this mistake again!
Hope this helps someone!
EDIT: just to add, this is by no means entirely the fault of the agency, certainly I have to learn to be more assertive and confident, it’s always been an issue for me sadly!
I shall be taking a few days off and sitting around my tree and being with my friends and family.
See you all very soon!
Much love. x
Body hair. You might think it’s a matter of personal taste. But really it’s not. It’s not. I’d like to know when it became the case that if a woman doesn’t remove her body hair she becomes an object of revulsion for Joe Public.
Since when and why? Why should we be compelled to remove our body hair? Quite frankly its a pain in the arse.
So what do I do? I epilate my legs, but prior to the last year I have always shaved them, and in winter I might have let it slip a bit from time to time (I don’t let it slide now I epilate because starting from scratch is far too painful). Armpits, I’d never ever dream of letting that grow. Other areas? Well, if I can be be bothered I do, but generally speaking I make an effort to keep tidy, particularly if I’m going swimming, but I’m never ever going to be a brazillian kind of a girl.
But you know what, all these things I do, I don’t do them because I dislike body hair. In truth it doesn’t bother me. But what does bother me is the thought of being seen in public with any kind of body hair. I realised how much of a problem this was when I was thinking about my outfit for a forthcoming Christmas party and pondering removing the tiny blonde hairs from my toes so people don’t call me a hobbit.
I’ve known people shave their arms (who weren’t excessively hairy), and god knows what else. It’s just awful that we feel we have to remove our hair in order to be socially accepted.
Who can forget Julia Roberts looking beautiful…but all anyone spoke about was her armpits?
A pretty grim state of affairs, and I don’t mean the armpits.
Obviously there are people who find body hair revolting, which is fine if that’s their personal preference, they are of course entitled to feel that way, but in my experience it’s quite often it’s those same people who loudly complain if anyone does have body hair. My immediate reaction upon seeing a lady with any kind of body hair is “ewww”…but on reflection, I’m not revolted at all, it’s social conditioning at its finest.
There seems to be some kind of myth that body hair is a dirty thing. In fact it’s quite the opposite, our body hair serves several purposes, protecting against friction, cold and germs.
So I’ll continue to remove mine when I can be bothered, and I’ll continue to keep myself neat and tidy and I’ll continue to keep myself hair free when getting my legs out in public or wearing something that exposes my armpits…but just so you know, it’s not because I find it revolting, it’s because I don’t want to be ridiculed.
And just so you know, if you choose not to shave your legs or shave your armpits, I’m going to make a massive effort not to have an involuntary shudder because I’m not actually revolted by you, I’m socially programmed to find it revolting and from now on I’m going to fight that.
I am so glad I’m not single these days, because whilst it was always the done thing to keep your bikini line tidy I’m not sure I could brave having sex for the first time when I get the impression that the norm these days is absolutely no public hair. And its out of my comfort levels to get on all fours for a beautician.
And what of my daughters? We all know what teenage peer pressure can be like…and things are so much harder than they used to be. It’s not okay to be pale, it’s not okay to have body hair, it’s always been a source of torment for teens that they might not have big enough boobs, it’s just all too much and its all too much too young.
I’m not in any way saying we should all just go mad and let all our body hair grow wild, but I’d like to see a shift in trends to be more accepting, so all women have a choice to do what they like without fear of ridicule.